“Like in Gay”….or not.
With great enthusiasm (despite the trailer – which I’ll point out later) I went to see “The Kids Are All Right†last week. I was pretty stoked to be seeing a mainstream, Hollywood film produced and directed by a lesbian feminist – Lisa Cholodenko – whose other directorial credits include “Hung,†“The L Word,†and “Six Feet Under.â€
The film is about two teenagers (Mia Wasikowska and Josh Hutcherson) who are being raised by their lesbian moms (Julianne Moore and Annette Benning). We pick up their story as they decide to contact their biological father/sperm donor (Mark Ruffalo) much to the chagrin of Benning’s character, Nic.
First off, I want to get out of the way that I was really entertained by, and actually, liked the Bechdel-approved, film overall. So, don’t think I’m not a total stick in the mud. BUT, you can assume if that’s the preface to everything else I’m about to say – it was not without its problems. The number one most irritating aspect of this film is its depiction of lesbian sexuality. Surprising, given that it was written and directed by a lesbian…just goes to show how powerful those production dollars are.
Less that half and hour into the film, we see a love scene between Julianne Moore and Annette Benning. They start out by watching homosexual, male porn. Huh? Moore’s character, Jules, later attempts to explain this by saying that “female sexuality is internalized†and sometimes they need to see it externalized, and that the depiction of lesbian pornography between two normally heterosexual women is too fake and unrealistic….which is true, and would probably be enough to satisfy the mildly annoyed. But, to add fuel to the proverbial fire, Jules later has an affair with Mark Ruffalo’s charmingly grungy, motorcycle-riding character, Paul. The lengthy, multi-scene, film-long affair was used as the driving force of the story…which really has nothing to do with the kids being alright.
It felt to me that the depiction of lesbian sexuality in this film was processed and packaged in such a way to make it fully palatable to heterosexual audiences – particularly, to the heterosexual, male members of those audiences. The unnecessary relationship between Paul and Jules was the manifestation of what is a far too common narrative in pop culture: lesbian women really do want to fuck men…it just takes the right man (and the right amount of coercion) to make them realize that. The presence of the affair was not surprising as they give you some hint of it in the trailer (below) – which again feels like an attempt to make the heterosexual audience comfortable with the homosexual themes.
Bennings’ character was really the saving grace of that aspect of the film. She was never for one moment charmed by Paul (though I was). At one point in the film he attempts to give her parenting advice – to which she replies – “I need your advice like I need a dick up my ass!†And, that about sums it up.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DgwjTy_cohg[/youtube]
Yes, I am so happy to hear an honest review on this film. Being a lesbian, I am naturally curious about this movie and everybody that knows me keeps tell me that I need to see this movie.
I had a feeling there would be some “depiction of lesbian sexuality in this film was processed and packaged in such a way to make it fully palatable to heterosexual audiences – particularly, to the heterosexual, male members of those audiences.” –That’s annoying, but expected.
Thanks, Melanie 🙂
Comment by Kristin — September 21, 2010 @ 6:29 pm
Actually, Lani wrote the post. Look near the tags. Glad you liked it, though.
Comment by Melanie — September 21, 2010 @ 7:30 pm
Thanks for the compliments and the cred! @ Kristin – you should see it anyway! I would love to hear your thoughts and interpretations!
Comment by Lani — September 22, 2010 @ 8:57 am
I have never seen this movie, but just by looking at the trailer the first time got me annoyed. First off I knew it was about a lesbian couple raising their children, which only confused me as to why the hot Mark Ruffalo was in the picture. I felt the exact same way when I saw the Moore/ Ruffalo scene in the trailer because it did give that message you pointed out ” lesbian women really do want to fuck men…it just takes the right man (and the right amount of coercion) to make them realize that”. Many of my of my lesbian friends were pissed after watching this movie because it was giving the message that homosexuality can be “cured” (and it’s not even a desease to start with. Thanks for the post. 😀
Comment by ElizabethP — October 8, 2010 @ 9:09 pm